0-8-4
by by7the7sea
Summary: Another drabble. Simmons, Fitz and Lincoln are investigating a recently found object that appears to be alien.
1. Chapter 1 - First Strike

"I think I know a little something about electricity," Lincoln declared.

"Yes, that may be, but when you are dealing with alien technology, you can't go by Earth physics," Simmons politely responded.

"I also know a little something about aliens," Lincoln replied and gave her a knowing look.

She returned his with a confused one. Then he held up his hand and let a few sparks fly.

"Oh, right, but that's biology and we are dealing with technology ..."

"Jemma, Lincoln, check this out," Fitz interrupted them as he turned the device over. "There's a door here."

The two joined Fitz on the other side of the table.

"Ohhh," all three said at once as Fitz pried the small door open.

"Well that was unexpected," Fitz exclaimed.

"What is that?" Simmons inquired trying to get a better look.

"Kind of looks like a battery," Fitz said.

"Let me see," Lincoln responded while trying to squeeze between Fitz and Simmons. Once he had a good look at it, he tentatively tried poking it to see if it would move. He promptly received a shock that knocked him back.

"Lincoln! Are you alright?" Simmons ran over to the Inhuman, who started laughing.

"Kind of tickled," Lincoln responded, giggling. He shook his head and stood up. "That may have been some kind of defense mechanism, let me take another look."

"Are you sure you want to try that again?" Fitz was actually questioning the man's sanity.

"That little jolt packed quite a punch which would have hurt either of you, but I'm fine."

"If you're sure, go ahead," Fitz responded and moved out of the way.

Lincoln moved in closer and just before he tried again, he said, "You may want to step back ... just to be safe."

Fitz and Simmons simultaneously took a giant step back.

"Huh ..." Lincoln said as he poked at the object.

"What?"

"What is it?"

"I don't think this is alien," Lincoln stated.

"Why?"

"How could that be?"

"Since when do aliens use," Lincoln started to reply as he pulled a tiny object from the device, "Duracell batteries."

"What?"

"Let me see that," Simmons said as she grabbed it from Lincoln.

Just as Simmons handed the battery to Fitz, the trio heard something from the hall.

Outside the lab was Hunter and Skye, both doubled-over laughing.

"This means war," Lincoln whispered to Fitz and Simmons, who both nodded in agreement.

 **AUTHOR'S NOTE:** I want to apologize for ending it like that. At the moment, I've got nothing. Not sure how to follow that up, but if inspired, I'll add to this.


	2. Chapter 2 - Set Up

**Author** **'** **s note:** Inspiration struck and now for the next chapter.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Director Coulson was walking through the halls of the Playground when he heard a small commotion coming from the training room. As he turned the corner, he was almost run over by Lincoln.

"Oh, sorry, sir," Lincoln apologized for the near-collision.

"No harm, no foul," Coulson responded. As he finished his visual check to make sure his suit was in perfect condition. "What's going on?"

"Nothing, sir, why would you ask?"

"Because you seem to be in a hurry and my 'spidey-sense' is telling me something's up."

"No, sirree, nothing going on here," Lincoln said as he glanced back the way he came. "Sorry, but I need to ... check something ... back in the lab."

Lincoln dashed away before Coulson could say anything more.

"Alrighty then," Coulson responded as he watched Lincoln leave. "Hmmm ..."

Coulson continued down the hall and ran into Fitz.

"Oh, sir, did you see Lincoln?"

"Yeah, he seemed in a hurry to get to the lab."

"Ah, thank you, sir. I'll catch up with him there," Fitz responded and started to walk away then turned back. " ... uh, sir, shouldn't you be getting back to your office?"

"No, there's nothing there that needs my attention right now."

"Uhm ... okay ..." Fitz turned around and started back down the hall with a worried expression on his face.

Coulson had just stepped into the training room to figure out what was going on when Simmons appeared at the other end of the hall and yelled, "Director!"

Coulson poked his head back into the hallway, "What is it, Simmons?"

"Sir," Simmons responded as she approached the man, "you should come with me to the lab. I have some very interesting ... uhm ... results to show you ... from those ... experiments ... I've been running."

"I'll check those later."

Simmons just stood there.

"Was there something else?"

"No, sir."

"Then you're dismissed and I'll be by to see those results once I'm finished here."

"Yes, sir," Simmons responded with a sigh. She slowly turned and walked down the hall, looking back every couple of steps.

Coulson stood in the doorway of the training area and surveyed it. Everything seemed to be in order. Maybe he was imagining things. He had turned around to leave when something caught his eye. There was something off with the punching bag. He walked over and around it, examining it from every side. He gave it a bit of a tap, then threw a couple of punches.

 _*Pop*_

Suddenly his head was covered with shaving cream. He stumbled back a few steps, wiping the sticky mess, from his face when he fell onto the workout mat.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Meanwhile, back in the lab ... Lincoln, Fitz and Simmons were discussing (more like arguing) what they should do.

"Well if you hadn't insisted ..." Fitz said as he pointed at the Inhuman.

"What do you mean me? We all agreed," Lincoln interrupted

"Clearly if you would have listened to me ...," Simmons chimed in.

 _*Pop*_

All three froze.

"No," Simmons responded. "It couldn't be."

"Uh oh," Fitz exclaimed.

Lincoln started to say, "You don't think ..."

"Well the rest of the team isn't due back for at least an hour," Fitz said.

The trio ran out of the lab.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Coulson sat on the mat. He tried to stand up, but couldn't. It appeared that he was stuck to the mat. He sighed.

"Really?"

Just as he was trying to figure a way out of his current situation. Lincoln, Simmons and Fitz ran into the room.

"Oh, dear me," exclaimed Simmons. "Sir, what happened?"

"Okay, which of you three is responsible for this?"

"What ... whatever are you ... you talking about," Fitz tried to say nonchalantly.

Lincoln grabbed a towel out of a nearby cabinet and handed it to the Director.

"Thanks," Coulson said as he started to wipe off the shaving cream. "You still haven't answered my question. Who did this?"

"Well ..."

"Uhm ..."

"You see ..."

"So, all of you then?"

The trio nodded.

"Fine, we'll discuss it later, once I'm freed and cleaned up. But right now, get me off of here."

"Right. about that, sir ..." Fitz started to say, pointing at Coulson then looking to Lincoln.

"I'm afraid you'll have to remove your pants," Lincoln stated. "It's the safest way."

Simmons blushed.

"I'll just ... go ... check ... on ..." Simmons babbled then left the room.

Fitz and Lincoln grabbed a few more towels and laid them around the Director to cover up the remaining areas with glue on it.

After Coulson unbuttoned and unzipped his pants, Lincoln grabbed the man under the arms and pulled him back a few steps then set him on his feet.

Lincoln had to turn his head and stifle a laugh. He wasn't prepared for the sight of a grown man wearing Captain America briefs. Fitz took it in stride, fully aware of the extent of the man's love of the Avenger.

Coulson walked over to the cabinet and grabbed the last towel. He wrapped it around his waist and turned to the two young men.

"You two and Simmons, clean up this mess then meet me in my office in an hour."

"Yes, sir," Lincoln responded.

Fitz nodded and turned to start cleaning up.

As Coulson entered the hallway, Simmons was waiting just outside the door.

"Did you hear that?"

"Yes, sir."

"Good, you have one hour."

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Exactly one hour later, Fitz, Simmons and Lincoln arrived at Coulson's office.

The Director gave them a stern lecture on responsibility and the recklessness of what they did. After making sure they understood and handed out punishment, he dismissed them.

As the three of them walked back to the lab, they reached an agreement. Their next attempt would have to be much more subtle.


	3. Chapter 3 - Regrouping

**xxx SHIELD xxx**

Fitz was nonchalantly walking down the hall. Well, he was trying to be casual about it, but if anybody who knew him saw him, they would immediately know something was up. Luckily for him, the place was practically deserted except for a few maintenance personnel. As he reached his destination, he looked both ways at least twice then opened the door.

"It's about time you showed up, we were starting to think you weren't coming," Lincoln said as he grabbed Fitz and pulled him into the server room. Lincoln checked outside the door to make sure nobody saw him, then quietly closed the door.

"There was no need to check, nobody followed me," Fitz protested.

"We can't be too careful, if we want this to go off without a hitch."

"We are going to have to make sure May and Coulson are not around for our next attempt," Simmons said.

"How can we do that?" The Inhuman wasn't sure the two leaders ever left the base at the same time. It had been pretty quiet of late, so it seemed they were either always there or one would go offsite without the other. It was almost as if they suspected something and wouldn't leave the base unattended.

"Well, eventually, _something_ will need both of their attention, and they will have to go," Simmons stated, with a bit more confidence than one would expect from her.

"Do tell," Fitz responded.

"Well ... you know, it might be better if I didn't tell you ... plausible deniability. Just rest assured, our time will come," Simmons said with a sly smile.

"So what's the plan ... do we have one yet?" Lincoln was anxious to get this meeting over with before somebody noticed the trio missing.

"We'll need something that will be more direct, something that won't just catch anybody who walks into the room."

"You guys know them better than I do, do they have a daily routine that they follow?"

"Hunter, sort of. Skye, definitely not."

Lincoln chuckled. "Why doesn't that surprise me? That will definitely make it more of a challenge where Skye is concerned."

"Hunter enjoys a good beer, maybe we could do something with that?"

"Hey, a frat house pulled a prank where they flooded a guy's dorm room with beer. It took three kegs to get everything soaked."

"Too messy," Simmons said with a look of disgust. "Coulson would definitely make us clean that up. We'll need something simpler."

"I know what we can do!" Fitz proclaimed.


	4. Chapter 4 - Plan in Action

**xxx SHIELD xxx**

A couple of days later, both Coulson and May were called away for some early meetings: May with her ex-husband Andrew and Coulson had a meeting with Weaver.

Once the quinjet left the hangar, Fitz, Simmons and Lincoln sprung into action. It didn't take long to set their plan in motion.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Hunter's alarm went off and he sleepily stretched then turned off the annoying sound. He yawned and rolled over.

"Hey, Bob ..." he squeaked then stopped.

" _That didn't sound right,_ " he thought then cleared his throat and tried again.

"Bob ..."

Bobbi stirred and said, "Morning already? What ... what's going on?"

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Outside Hunter's door, Lincoln, Fitz and Simmons stoodz listening.

"Uhm, did either of you know Bobbi was going to be in there?"

The other two shook their heads in denial.

"We should go."

The trio quickly took off down the hallway.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

"I don't know what's going on," Hunter squeaked out.

"You sound like a chipmunk," Bobbi laughed at him.

"And you sound like Minnie Mouse," Hunter shot back.

"It's cute," she giggled then cozied up to him a bit more, "kind of turning me on."

Hunter tilted his head to get a better look at her.

"Oh really? More so than my natural voice?" He leaned closer to her.

"Yep." She pulled him closer.

Hunter started whispering in her ear and they dove back under the covers.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Meanwhile, Fitz, Lincoln and Simmons wandered back into the hall.

"Maybe we should we check on them?" Fitz asked as they walked back to the room.

Lincoln had already reached the door and leaned next to it. After a few minutes, he grinned and moved away from the door.

"Uhm, I don't think that will be necessary. They're fine."

"Well, how do you know unless we open the door?" Simmons was quite concerned and walked over to the door.

"Trust me," Lincoln responded as he blocked her from opening the door, "you don't want to go in there right now."

At first, Simmons was offended, but then she heard some groans coming from the room.

"Ah, yes, they seem ... quite ... well."

"What are you two going on about?" Fitz stepped closer and heard a shout from the other side of the door and jumped back. "Oh, right, they do sound quite ... healthy ..."

The trio walked back down the hall and, as they turned the corner, Fitz asked, "So does this count as payback or will we have to think of something else?"


	5. Chapter 5 - End Game

**xxx SHIELD xxx**

With Bobbi on his side, they decided it wasn't worth it to try and get revenge on Hunter, so the trio focused their attention on Skye.

In the lab, Lincoln, Fitz and Simmons huddled together in a corner working on a formula.

"No, no, not too much," Fitz exclaimed when Simmons was pouring a blue liquid into the beaker.

"I know what I'm doing, no need to shout." As she said this, she turned to look at him and poured a little bit more in. "Now look what you made me do."

"Great! Now we'll have to start over . . . again."

Jemma stirred the concoction then examined it closely.

"It should be fine," she stated . . . trying to convince herself more than anyone else.

"Guys, that's it, right?" Lincoln asked as he looked over the formula they had drawn up.

They all turned their attention to the small glass vial.

"Yep," Simmons stated.

"So how do we give this to her?" A very legitimate concern expressed by Fitz.

Lincoln leaned over and cringed when he caught a whiff of it. "Uh, it's not supposed to smell like rotten eggs, is it? That'll be hard to disguise."

"Seeing how much she enjoys food, maybe, if we spike a few different things with it, she won't notice?" Simmons remarked hopefully.

"Maybe we can get rid of that smell," Lincoln said as he checked the various chemical compounds they had rounded up.

Fitz walked over to the table to help Lincoln look.

"Here, this should do it," Fitz said as he handed Simmons another vial." Just a couple of drops should take care of the smell."

Simmons carefully added the suggested amount and, a few moments later, the smell disappeared.

"Good. We should be all set now," the biochemist said with a smile.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

"You're sure it will just be a temporary effect, right?" Lincoln questioned his co-conspirators as they took the water bottle they had spiked with their special concoction to Skye.

Simmons and Fitz gave each other a look and responded.

"Yes."

"Of course."

Arriving at the training room, Fitz and Simmons hid in the hall while Lincoln took the water bottle into Skye.

"Hey Skye, here," Lincoln said as he tossed the water bottle to her." As a doctor, I know the importance of staying hydrated while working out."

Skye stopped just in time to catch the bottle.

"Thanks. I was just about to take a break." Skye opened the bottle and drank over half of it.

"Hm," Skye licked her lips." Where did you fill this? Doesn't taste quite right."

"Oh, that . . . I just . . . added a boost to help . . . replenish your electrolytes. That must be it . . ."

Skye scrutinized Lincoln for a moment, then said, "Okay . . ."

"Well, I better get back to the lab. See ya."

As Lincoln left, Skye looked at the water bottle again and sniffed it. She shrugged, finished it off then went back to her training.

 **xxx SHIELD xxx**

Back in the lab, the trio kept busy. Fitz continued testing Lincoln's control on his abilities while Simmons worked on a special project.

"So, how long until it takes effect?" Lincoln asked as he slowly electrified a long metal rod.

"Depending on how much she drinks of it and . . . ," Simmons started to say when she was interrupted by a loud shriek.

"Umm, how about now?" Fitz finished Simmons statement.

"LINCOLN!"

"Uh oh," Lincoln exclaimed then dropped the rod which immediately sent a shock to a nearby computer, shorting it out." Oops, I'll pay for that."

Skye came running into the lab

"LINCOLN! What on earth is this?" She held out her arm which was turning a lovely shade of blue.

"What's the matter, Skye? Feeling a bit blue?" Lincoln couldn't help himself, then he laughed.

"You're looking a little blue, Skye?" Simmons added.

"Blue Skye!" Fitz exclaimed.

"Ha, ha, very funny guys. So how long will this last?" Skye started examining her other arm then her legs which were just turning blue.

"Oh, it should clear up by tomorrow," Fitz stated.

"The weekend by the very latest," Simmons added.

"What?"

"Don't worry about it, Skye," Lincoln said." You're looking very Kree-licious."

It actually took a week for the blue color to completely disappear.

Skye takes every chance she can get to remind them of that fact too.

 **xxx THE END xxx**


End file.
